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First things first: today is Ned's 2nd birthday. Some things he has accomplished during his second year of life:
1. Whenever Brian's dogs venture near him, instead of doing Halloween cat and hissing, he now just flattens his ears and swats half-heartedly in their direction. This is known as Progress.
2. Tried, and eventually disdained, the Great Feline Toilet Training Debacle of aught seven.
3. Having all houseplants relocated to high, out-of-reach shelves where they will never again be watered. It's either death by draught or death by cat teeth. Pick your poison, feckless houseplants. Actually, you can't, because the cat has already chosen for you.
4. Once, when Arthur (Ned's favorite toy) was accidentally sequestered in a basket on top of the entertainment center, he stood on top of the TV stretched out and fished him out with a paw.
5. Escaped the apartment every time the door was left unlocked for even a nanosecond. In fact, he did it this morning.
6. He's tricked many unsuspecting bipeds into thinking he wants to play, only to sit there looking smug and disinterested when a toy is tossed near him.
Here's a video of Ned from his first birthday. My little Shark! My baby kitten! He will probably never stop being the kitten in my mind. This is because when I met him he was one day old or something. So little! Little floppy tiger cub ears! Man, baby animals are the best. I am a fan of neutering pets, but I am also a fan of hanging out with baby animals. Such a conundrum! Anyway, please enjoy sharkiness:
Today is my last day working for Fancy Event Planning. Please note: Events produced by Fancy Event Planning are not especially fancy. I simply cannot think of abandoning the "Fancy" pseudonym that I've been appending to my every place of employment for the last five years: Fancy Publishing, Fancy Magazine, Fancy Museum, Fancy Clothing Designer, Fancy Insurance, and so on. Although… I guess I could tell you all those names freely now, though, couldn't I? Since I no longer work for them? Right? Right?! Conde Nast! Men's Health! Museum of Modern Art! Polo Ralph Lauren! Marsh & McLennan! I am drunk with freedom! What other enticing kibble-crumbs can I reveal now?! One time I pretended I'd done my geometry homework… but I really hadn’t. Ahh, rebellion is sweet!!!!
And now we come to the terminus of my time with Fancy Events. Well, I will not reveal the name just yet. This is because I still am relishing the hope that they're going to chase me down and grab hold of my ankles as I am leaving this afternoon. And then I will probably be injured, and can sue them!
So why am I leaving? Skrait up: the business is very sick and can no longer afford to keep me. Business has Lou Gehrig's Disease. Tragedy! They held a big ugly round of layoffs two weeks ago, which I survived, but freelancers are never truly safe in these situations. One time I was working in HR for a company which was laying off like, everyone in the company, plus some people who didn't even work there, but were just passing the building at the wrong time. It was harsh. Anyway, once the layoffs were done, they were like, "Okay Angela… peace out!" I almost had to laugh at that one since, like, dude, what did you THINK was gonna happen?
This one, though, is sad. It's sad because it's been a lovely experience, as far as skill/challenge/not having to work with jackholes (everyone here is awesome), and both sides, me and my colleagues, are just like, "Well… this sucks." I don't take it personal. It sucks, but I WILL SURVIVE! Have survived before, will survive again. As Kurt Vonnegut said, "So it goes" "She is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae." It's like he read my mind!
Good news is, this is happening at a very good time relative to AIDSWalk, since it will be beneficial to have all my energy focused on that for the next two weeks.
Here's another side benefit: Some people came over to Casa Snack last night, and anytime someone gave me a hard time about anything (playing "The Joshua Tree," for instance, or wanting to close a window), I wailed despondently, "BUT I GOT FIRED TODAY, WAAAHHH, HOW COULD YOU!!!" It was fun. I intend to milk this for as long as possible. Also, Zach brought home cupcakes. What a guy! |
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