 I Could Quote Boyz II Men In This Here LJ Subject Line, If I Wanted To, But I Do Not
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Mar. 24th, 2008 @ 11:46 am 
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Button was my parents' dog. But before that, she was my beloved grandmother's last dog. Last pet. Button, so named because she was said to be as cute as one, lived to the very respectable age of 18 (18! that's like, 250 in dog years), so we cannot complain that she was with us for too short a time. It's still hard, though, to say goodbye to an old friend, particularly one with such a big presence. Button was a purebred toy poodle, and as sometimes happens with purebred dogs, she was a little bit crazy. Okay a lot crazy. A big heaping ball of crazy. Because of this, though, she never came up short on entertainment factor, and what she lacked in sweetness, she made up for in punishing adorableness. Button has been cantankerous since she was born, I think. I can't remember a time that she didn't constantly growl and/or bite people and/or both. Had her mouth not been the size of, like, an eraser, she would probably have been more universally hated. Button passed away last week, and as she's the last of my childhood pets to move on to the great chewy bone in the sky, this is a hard one.
Ten Favorite Memories of Button
1. When she was a puppy and still lived with my grandparents, I'd lay on the floor facedown on their Oriental rugs, and Button would jump all over me, trying to dig at my face and put her snout in the crook of my arm. It kind of hurt, but was also really cute. Puppies rule. I was twelve. Twelve!
2. Button, meet wild fox. Wild fox, meet Button, domestic raccoon, and two teenage cousins. How my grandparents ever endured this setup, I will never know. We believe the reason Button was so neurotic is because she grew up from babyhood running around with a wild fox. Which, you know, will do that to a person. Or dog.
3. Gran discovered that if you picked Button up around her ribcage, she'd stick her front legs out in front of her in prayer position and splay her back legs, and she'd hold this position, even if you zoomed her all around the room yelling "WOnnnnnNNNNder-Dog!" I mean, not that we did that, like, all the time, or anything.
4. To see me through long winters of Button-less-ness, my grandparents would send videos of Button from Florida, my favorite of which involves her soccering a key lime all around their living room.
5. At some point we discovered that if you massaged the skin on Button's lower back, she would growl hideously and snap at you. My high school girlfriends and I did this so often and so relentlessly that eventually I could stand ten feet away from her and hold my hands up in the air and make grabby motions, and she would start growling warnings at me. If I kept it up, she'd bark and snap at the air.
5a. Nicole and I used to like to make home movies, and the piece de resistance of our collection was probably the time we anthropomorphized a quartet of dog biscuits and had them crooning along to Patsy Cline songs. (Believe it or not, we probably were not drunk when we thought this up.) The dramatic tension came when the dad dog biscuit left to use the toilet (doll house furniture, obviously. It's exactly dog biscuit-sized), and Sandy and Button came in and ravaged the entire Dog Biscuit family. We had to have monstrous growling dog sound effects, and of course we used Button and her growl-on-command talent to achieve that. She was an artist.
6. She howled. She had a very hoarse little voice, but she warbled along whenever I practiced piano. Her favorite song to howl along with was Fur Elise. Howling dogs are the cutest.
7. Button disliked sudden movements, and one time a guy I was seeing tried to vehemently tickle me while we were sitting on my parents' couch, and, sensing the need to defend her turf, Button leaped across my lap and totally bit him on the hand. I felt bad, but not really that bad, because it was pretty funny. He did not try to tickle me anymore after that. Lesson learned. Related: my parents' next door neighbor, The FBI, was legitimately scared of Button because she tried to attack his feet every time he set foot in their house. Button hated The FBI with a deep and abiding passion. We aren't sure why. Button was just kind of a hater. Also: crazy.
8. She felt safest when she was riding in a car draped across someone's neck, preferably my grandmother or my mother. One night I was home alone for the weekend and my friend Zach (now boyfriend Zach!) was visiting me. I didn't want to stay home alone because there were thunderstorms or something and anyway I was kind of a coward about staying in my parents' house (whatever, dudes, it's a scary house. I can't believe I ever spent nights there alone at all), so I loaded the dogs into the car and drove Zach home and on the way over, Sandy sat in his lap and Button climbed up his shoulder and draped herself around his neck.
9. When Button started to go a bit dotty, sometimes she would stand in the middle of the room and bark and howl at nothing, for no reason. My mom would eventually get tired of this and yell, "Button! Go lie down or go eat dog food!", and Button would do it.
10. Button had an operation on her chest, maybe three or four years ago, and I will never forget the expression on her face following her surgery. She'd had teeth extracted too, so her mouth looked all snaggly and she was totally groggy and high, all, "check it out, my paw has itsh own aura and shit, hey you guysh want to order mexican?" Drugged up animals are hilario.
We will all miss you, Wonder Dog. (Except for maybe my parents' next door neighbor.) |
Awwwww.......RIP, Li'l nipper.
Thanks. She was crazy. :)
MY grammaw had a little-bitty chihuahua named Dusty who vibrated. But I don't remember him ever being nippy.
There was a white toy poddle in our neighborhood just three houses down from my house. He chased me once when I was about 6 and jumped up and bit me on my inner right thigh about a millimeter from my right nut. I hated dogs for years after that. Was terrified of them.
But I'm much better now.
Heh, I feel bad for sort of triumphing in Button's evilness. Not all toy poodles are evil. My parents have another one who's extremely sweet and never bites. I just like them because they are all such silly dogs.
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| From: | ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) iskew |
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| Date: |
March 24th, 2008 06:23 pm (UTC) |
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Awww.. too bad.
She must never have gone after you, huh. :)
She was so crazy. I'm gonna miss her.
May she be bathed in dog biscuits and love.
That's so sweet... thanks Carlos :)
| From: | (Anonymous) |
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| Date: |
March 24th, 2008 11:28 pm (UTC) |
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This post makes me smile and cry at the same time. My dog, Ellie, is a 15 year-old Black Lab living with my mother on Long Island. She's reaching the end of her days, but reading your post makes that softer to swallow. Button the wonder dog is awesome, may she chase raccoons and foxes in little doggie heaven (or wherever it is they go!). Thanks for this post.
This post makes me smile and cry at the same time. My dog, Ellie, is a 15 year-old Black Lab living with my mother on Long Island. She's reaching the end of her days, but reading your post makes that softer to swallow. Button the wonder dog is awesome, may she chase raccoons and foxes in little doggie heaven (or wherever it is they go!). Thanks for this post.
Awwww no! I never got to say goodbye :(
Actually I thought Button had passed on quite a while ago. I really need to pay better attention to these things.
This post reminds me of how much I'm going to miss Toby when he goes, pain-in-the-ass 15-year-old cocker spaniel that he is. Great memories.
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